We have been really fortunate that through all her treatments, her blood count numbers have been high enough that treatments have never been postponed. Today our luck changed and her numbers we significantly lower than they needed to be to go through with treatment. What a blow. I did not expect this at all and when the nurse explained to Ania that she would not have chemo today, Ania actually cried. So did I. After all this time and the several set backs over the last year, why could we not just finish on our own terms? Cancer just doesn't know how to play fair.
So we picked up our belongings and went back to the car. Even though our hands were full of our belongings and as Ania held my hand for a moment, I couldn't help but feel that we were leaving empty handed. We were supposed to be given a gift today that just didn't come. We will get it another day of course but it's still so disappointing.
So we have a few days to really take this whole experience in a little longer. To just keep exercising our patience and to just keep living.
Since we were not spending a night in the hospital, we took the opportunity to get out and enjoy one of the last nights of summer out in our beautiful city. It was a breath of fresh air and reminder to stay patient. We have lots of cancer-free days ahead. This minor setback just gives us another opportunity to marvel at Ania's fighting, ever joyful spirit in the midst of cancer.